Why Are We Still There?

Every day there are news reports about more deaths.

 

Every night on TV there are photos of death and destruction.
Why are we still there?

 

We occupied this land, which we had to take by force, but it causes us nothing but trouble.
Why are we still there?

 

Many of our children go there and never come back.
Why are we still there?

 

Their government is unstable, and they have no leadership.
Why are we still there?

 

Many of their people are uncivilized.
Why are we still there?

 

The place is subject to natural disasters, which we are supposed to bail them out of.
Why are we still there?

 

There are more than 1000 religious sects, which we do not understand.
Why are we still there?

 

Their folkways, foods and fads are unfathomable to ordinary Americans.
Why are we still there?

 

We can't even secure the borders.
Why are we still there?

 

They are billions of dollars in debt and it will cost billions more to rebuild, which we can't afford.
Why are we still there?

 

It is becoming clear . . . WE MUST PULL OUT OF CALIFORNIA.

Successful Marriage Tips

My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last.

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food and companionship. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in Florida and mine is in N.Y.

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

She has an electric blender, electric toaster,and electric breadmaker. Then she said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.

My wife told me the car wasn't running well, there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was, she told me, "In the lake."

My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but BOY, can she climb a tree now!

She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!"